Archive for the ‘desis’ Category

a day in the life of a us-based indian (desi) engineer

March 12, 2008

9:00 am — arrive at work in a toyota, honda sedan/suv or a lexus for those with extra cash. parallel parking still a nightmare.

9:00 – 9:30 — small quantity of coffee with large amounts of creamer and sugar. time to meet fellow desis at work and brainstorm on the latest bollywood gossips. any conversation is incomplete without a debate on cricket. the more educated, sophisticated, intelligent ones might deliberate on the day’s sudoku or crossword.

9:30 – 10:00 — read world news on rediff.com, check emails and a few femails on matrimonial sites.

10:00 – 12:00 — put on the earphones. listen to old bollywood songs, bryan adams – the god of rock music :-). knock a few times on the boss’ office to convince him that you’re still doing the job you were hired for.

12:00 – 1:00 — go to a desi buffet and complain how the food is not authentic or indian enough.

1:00 – 2:00 — discussion on eb1, eb2, i-140, i-485 or any other immigration related form/lawyer. a debate on what the U.S. would do without the immigrants. another shot of sugar loaded coffee.

2:00 – 4:00 — put more bugs in the code. write comments in a language of your choice except english. this is not for keeping secrets but an attempt to promote diversity in the code.

4:00 – 4:30 — time for an evening coffee. time for bitching about your current work place and how they’re taking advantage of you….discussion could also be on arranged marriages if some white folks interrupt the conversation.

4:30 – 6:00 — check emails and gTalk with friends.

6:00 – 7:00 — time to shape up that rice belly. rush to the gym and run for a few minutes on treadmill. do a few sets of bicep curls with 10 pound dumbbells. repeat the process, if an indian girl is in sight. buy a skin-hugging t-shirt if the size of biceps increases from 12 to 12.01 inches.

7:00 – 9:00 – dinner time. reach 15-30 minutes late and tell fellow desis how busy you are at work and how the company is trying to screw you because you do not have your green card.

9:00 – 11:00 – chat/call up the girl selected by parents/matrimonial sites. bombard her with your neo-liberal views and how you hate racism/stereotyping, and of course, a tirade on bollywood song and dance sequences.

11:00 – 11:11 – a very private quality time with images/glimpses of scarlett johansson, salma hayek, halle berry or karisma kapoor…..now that’s what i call an equal opportunity employer. btw, why 11 minutes – recommended time by paulo coelho is his book ‘eleven minutes’.

11:30 – till next morning – no more stereotyping

beatles|a day in life — indian version
I read the visa forums today oh, boy
About a lucky man who got the green card
And though the news was rather sad
Well, I just had to laugh


		
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